I am in the studio as much as possible, but the beginning of the year demands laborious tasks of record keeping from the previous year to be tended.  I am almost at the end of that torturous endeavor.  Thank the good Lord for that.

My mind is in hundreds of places at this time, and it is a time of disquiet, and little if any sleep for me.  I am in self made chains of distraction, that keep me in a state of vacillation in my art.  My mind wanders and finds no sure paths; other than the familiar trails left by previous paintings, that have no need of being taken again, so the journey becomes one of searching more than pleasure at this stage.

I am having some success, albeit long and hard won at times.  I am working with a muse that came to me  at a funeral.  Ashes to ashes and dust to dust was part of the graveside service, a familiar rift of words; but one that struck me as something I need to pursue in my art.  I am trying to meld the figure with the landscape and finding the commonality and the connectivity that exists.  My impetus is to see if land and figure can almost become one, yet still remain a figure in a landscape painting.  As a person that comes from a long line of farmers and currently married to a farmer, the land has a integral part of my life.  We are literally tied to and count on the land to survive, and one day will return to it.  I think in looking back on several of my paintings, I was subconsciously pursuing this goal.  I am focusing on the texture to carry the load of the paintings, as the textures will give it an affinity through the paint regardless of hues I choose to use.  I am always trying to find ways to transcend ordinary methodology in painting.  I cannot be happy with repetition no matter how well received  it might be with the public.  There is something in the discovery in art, that lures me like a junkie to heroin.  I have to find some newness in my art, to be happy with it. I believe as we grow we get more discerning in our art and  in our art making.  I find the beauty in art for me, is often found in the making of the art, and the trails and marks left by the process.  It is often not pretty, but tortured and wrought from hours of working, that in the end mesmerizes with its simplicity.

This is painted on a panel I ordered last year, Art and Enns Panels http://www.jerrysartarama.com/discount-art-supplies/canvas-and-boards/canvas-panels-and-boards/art-and-enns-art-panels.htm  .  I found the panel  to be great with only one drawback; the cradles are rather thin, and I found them  too thin to float in a floater frame.  So I had to opt for a deep flat frame. I am sure the cradles are thin because the panel itself is very tough and rigid and would stand alone without cradles just fine. You could just hang it without framing, but I don’t like the thinner panels without frames; although, each to his own in their framing. The surface is great and I will order more of these panels.  I painted this painting in acrylic but the panel can handle any media.

Here is the resulting painting. I titled it LandLady…but I may tweak the title as it feels foreign but for now will suffice.

detail of the beginning stages of LandLadyDetail of Landlady by Cathy Hegman

Detail of Landlady by Cathy Hegman

Land Lady by Cathy Hegman 36 x 24 acrylic on panel

Black and White shot of LandLady to show the values achieved

Thank you for reading my blog and I hope it helps in your art making, viewing or otherwise just love of creation.   Take care,

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

I paint from my mind’s eye and I do have a limited view of how it is perceived in the real world by others, unless you swallow your pride and  you put your work up and let someone tell you honestly what they think is good, bad, or worse boring about your work, then you may never push yourself to go further.   I don’t think I could have done  this in the beginning of my art career, I remember tearfully the times anyone would negatively comment on my work and I would get my feelings bruised and put a wall up that protected my ego; but at the same time kept me captive within the borders of what I thought I knew about myself.  Years later I find myself in a place that is ripe and waiting to hear what others think about my work.   There is quite simply no greater gift to an artist than an opinion by someone that is unbiased, knowledgeable and truthful.

One of the pieces that I took with me, was  Shadow Puppets, I was quite pleased with it, but that was not the opinion of group critique.  I was unsure of myself at this point, they did not want this piece.  What was so different about this one, how was it different than the ones they chose to keep?   I brought it home, put it away, and tried not to think about it for awhile, but for the last month it has nagged me to revisit it.  My first thought was to just  take  the painting as is and  put it in one of my other galleries, afterall, perhaps they would not see the unfinish that this gallery saw, everyone has a different idea of things. In my heart I knew the truth was evident  and I knew they were spot on in their opinion.  I knew I needed to learn something from the opinions that  I was given.  I trust and value their opinions and I did not want to waste this opportunity, so once again, I put it  on the easel. It looked foreign to me now for the first time, I was seeing it in a new light, a questioning light that would give me new ideas and insights, or so I hoped.   I looked at it for awhile, then to keep from starting on it, I tooled around the studio, glancing back every so often to see if I could see the unfinish they so clearly could see.  After a couple of hours of performing the avoidance dance around the painting, I backed my ears,  I prepared my palette and jumped right back in as if the painting had never been wired for hanging.   This was not without anguish, and not for the faint of heart, but if I lost it all, then perhaps it was meant to be.  I always know when I face my easel, no matter how far along a painting is, there is always the opportunity to make it more, or to destroy it, so this would be no different.  I like this uncertainty, it keeps me humble and honest with myself.

Shadow Puppets original by Cathy Hegman

I approached it with these questions:

What do I want to say with this piece? It began as a bridge piece between two series of works, the Dark Alice and the Manipulation series.  I am taking it more toward the Manipulation series in this update.

What is missing that will give this painting a more mature feel? In all honesty the painting seems to have a too slick appearance for me, it needs more texture to make the eye linger and want to stay in areas.  The painting design as a whole is so simplistic, it begs for something to slow you down and make you want to stay.  Texture is needed…

Why did I choose the original palette and does it need to change or be modified?

I chose the original palette because I am trying to make myself less reliant on hues and more on design.  I like the palette and will keep it but modify some of the hues to add to the interest factor.

Do I need to give up and paint the whole painting over?  Oh Lord, I hope not….that is almost like giving up and I am persistent if nothing else.

These questions led me to find my way to what I feel is becoming a  more profound and definitely more polished piece.  It is not completed but it is well on it’s way to being a contender for a place in a gallery.   I will post the progress in future posts!

There is always the difficulty of finding finish in your work.  I will on occasion walk through my house and see something that I think needs just a little tweak and off the wall it comes and the enhancements begin.  I will not lie and say it always works as an improvement but I learn something every time I force myself to see my work with new eyes.

Maturity is gained with trials and errors, I sometimes think the greatest thing we can share is our failures and even a better share if we give the lesson of learning from them to others.  Thanks for reading my blog and I hope it gives you courage to lay it on the line and give others the opportunity to see your work and in the process give you new found growth and strength in your work!  Take care and Happy Happy New Year to Everyone!

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

The beginning of all of my work starts with a gesture, often there is not much visually to  the eyes of others, but in my mind it tells the whole story.  It is the trunk on which I will add the branches that will enhance and glorify the story.  I find in the gesture stage I am finding the spacial relations that will work best for my work.

 Not much here to brag about but somehow in my mind’s eye this is the structure I want in this piece.  Notice the figure is the vertical and the horizontals break into the figure and connect it to the sides of the canvas.  I am thinking this gives the figure a connectedness it would otherwise not have with the whole space.  It is a lone figure like most have been this last year, I am thinking on the concept that we come here alone, we interact and learn and then we leave alone.   I feel the time I am most connected to myself is when I am alone, maybe this is why I paint, I am alone 90 percent of the time.

Beginning layers covering the words

I wrote down thoughts that had held me back this year, thoughts that had hurt me most and then I began layering the paint over the words and the gesture drawing.  There is a bit of madness in this method, and I only do this when there are strong emotions running rampant in my life, and the end of the year is very apropos for this action.  The layers will cover the words and bury them under layers, in the hope that  they will never emerge again.  I wonder if any of the collectors understand the blood, sweat and tears that go into the paintings that they collect.  I often wish I could tell someone the story behind the piece they are buying but then again, that might not be the best idea. It brings to mind there is beauty in sadness as well as in happiness.

layering and layering week twolayering and layering part 2 detail of face

Today,I find the changes happening in the paint are parallel to my feelings about the painting.  I have found this painting almost an extension of myself and through the  layers the painting has  lost parts and pieces of that connection, only to find them again in another stroke of paint.  This is the time when your inner confidence has to kick in, otherwise you will give up when you lose something you love in the painting.  You have to persevere and know that although, you may not find it again something better will emerge.  I particularly find the faces in my work have to go through representational stages and then be distorted and lost to be found acceptable to me. It is now in this stage that paint takes on the life in the painting.  The words of the last year are completely covered and the games begin.  The paint will now dictate the emotion of this piece by the texture and quality that will transform the surface and give it a richness that will evoke thoughts deeper than the figure alone could ever conceive.   This is the beauty of paint, it has the unique ability to transform the surface both in tactile ways and in visually. Oh, did I mention how much I love paint….

Day three of layering stages detail of face

More to come later on this painting….but for now I hope everyone has a Happy and Blessed New Year and that what is to come will far exceed any expectations that you may have…

Take care and

As always thank you for reading and I hope you find a sliver of inspiration in my work and words.

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

Update on Scarlet Gloves by Cathy Hegman
60 x 36 inches acrylic on canvas

I love the beginnings of paintings, they are at their most possible stage and the ideas are endless and flow with ease.  Here is  a detail shot of one that is on the easel this month.

thinking Scarlet Gloves…of course that could change tomorrow!

This  detail shows a bit of the texture I  have achieved so far .  I know at this point the gloves are rather orange but they are at their earliest stage at this point, and I think with layers and veils of hues on top of this orange hue they will have a really vibrant scarlet effect.

A couple of layers more….at this point it is too soft and fragile I will let it cure tonight and hit it again in the morning…

More to come later …..

Have a blessed and very Merry Christmas!

As always thank you for reading and I hope you find a sliver of inspiration in my work and words.

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

My work is somewhat like a family in its formation; they are at times at odds with each other, but still connected by the blood of medium and the hand that made them  The figures in my work are depictions of mental thoughts; that lurk and ramble inside my head, until they eventually find their way down the brush and  into my work.  I see them as familiars, something intrinsically a part of both my life and my work.

Flight fascinates me, and having a son as a pilot, I feel somewhat compelled to paint about flight on occasion. There are delicate balances in flying that must be kept in order to safely fly.  I think that is apropos for me right now as I feel out of balance in life with the state of unfinished and unrest in my studio.  Here is a work in progress that is circling with the landing gear down but has not quite made it on to the runway.

This is the beginning of the piece….a figure with the  gesture of curiosity.

The addition and subtraction of layers …the covering and uncovering of artifacts leads to  the texture that I desire, not only physically but mentally.  There is something that happens in between the layers that  seems to breathe new life into the painting. I am not sure if it comes from the time spent on the piece or the effort expended.  I feel this painting is  close but not quite there at this point, but I  thought I would share the progression of the work….I also added a part of my son’s flight charts that gives the formula for weights and balances for pilots, it just felt right to include it at this point.  There is always a chance   it might disappear under the layers in the future.

As always thank you for reading and I hope you find a sliver of inspiration in my work and words.

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

Incognito work in progress by Cathy Hegman

I think it comes from the feeling that most of my life is comprised of  the out of focus moments.  I am caught off guard by what I think I know about my place in life; only to find it is quite something else.  Where do I fit into  this life? I constantly find myself seeking to define my  space, the place where there is simply love and acceptance.  My figures  are a type of haiku for various  moments of reality.   I refer to this as the blurring, a time when we almost feel needed and wanted only to find we are simply an afterthought and the deepness that invades with this discovery.

detail of work in progress by Cathy Hegman I find hats and gloves are still something I feel a deep connection with; so my figures are usually either wearing them or referencing them in some way

I am painting the emotion of afterthought, the remembrance, the space between knowing and forgetting.  The time where we are in full motion, a gestural time where details are not needed, we recognize the shapes of the movements as familiar and defining.

Incognito work in progress by Cathy Hegman I like my figures to have a forward motion as if they are coming toward you...I think this is something deep seated in my psyche to have them passive aggressively seeking your attention, or maybe I just think they look good this way.

Perhaps it is my age and the shortening of my time, but I am finding myself checking my work less and less for any decorative value, and more and more for my relationship to each piece of art I create.  I am not finished until I find my connectedness with each painting, the small part of my life that is found somewhere in the paint and canvas recognizable only to me, that I leave behind  marking my place and time here.

Thank you for indulging me with your time!  I hope I give you a nudge to dig deeper in your art, or your love of art, and find a  more personal connection .

As always thank you for reading and I hope you find a sliver of inspiration in my work and words.

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

That being said I am back racking up layers of paint on canvas in a distillation process of finding the figure in shape and form. Oddly enough the desperation painting, I have done over the past two weeks has rendered me with a much more thoughtful eye to what is needed, and more importantly what is not in my work.  There has been much fervent overpainting in the studio and clawing and scratching of canvas, but it has given way now to a meditative, more assured application of pigment that is not only healing the wounds left on the canvas from the past few weeks but giving it a new life. These are the days that I love.

Here is the most current work on canvas…It is an amalgamation of  two series I have been working on, the dark Alice series and the manipulation series.  See if you can find the connections of the two….here is a hint :  the title is Shadow Puppets……

Shadow Puppets by Cathy Hegman

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

My focus has been on figurative art for the last several years and it continues.  I persevere with this subject not because I think I am particularly good at it, but because there is something deep inside of me, maybe in the marrow of my bones that tells me I have more to learn.   I have learned to go with your inner self’s direction, it seems to always lead you to the place you were meant to go.

Here a few of the pieces I worked on at Art Colony this fall.

Wool Gatherers by Cathy Hegman Hugh Williams Drawing Award Recipient Fall Mississippi Art Colony

Time Flies by Cathy Hegman

Time Constraints by Cathy Hegman

The bottom two are in various stages of finish and will need the proper vision and time to finish each one.  I am also still working in inks and drawing on unfriendly surfaces for ink, in an effort to push the limits of my drawing and working in a realm of chaos and or lack of control.  I like this place, it is for me, a freeing experience to know that each drawing is on the brink of loss and disaster with every drop of ink that hits the surface.  It is a good lesson in letting go of the precious.  Trust me, many drawings are scrapped in the process.  There are very few that make the cut and get to be counted among the successes.  I think editing is one of the keys to making really good art. Editing in all realms of the process of creating is usually a good habit to form. Editing in the process of painting takes enormous restraint and thought, but in the end pays off.  Perhaps the pay off is  not at first glance; but, I have found the pieces that I have put the most time and thought into, are always the ones that I go to again and again for new inspiration.  Leave some information out and it will always force the viewer and or creator to fill it in, then the art becomes interactive and stimulating.  Art without the interactive stimulation is simply decoration for the walls.

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.

If we manipulate others and they manipulate us all of our life, then perhaps manipulation even though it is  negatively thought of in a “puppeteer like” fashion, could just be a good thing and perhaps integral for life.

Here is the latest of the manipulation series of works:

This painting is titled Envy, as envy is one of the biggest manipulators in life, we want what we see and often we want to become what we see.  The figures in this piece are based on a concept I came up with after a wonderful trip to the zoo with my son Thomas.   We both love the zoo and all of the animals. I find  the exotics have the most  mesmerizing and fascinating patterns .   My dear artist friend, Tina Bradford, whom left this earth way too soon, loved zebras.  I always think of her when I see one, or see the familiar black and white pattern on anything.  This is a form of manipulation in itself, that has motivated me to work with this series of paintings.  I am creating  figures from my mind that are an amalgamation of animal and human and calling them “humanimals”. I am taking artistic license with this series.  I hope you find it interesting and perhaps will be manipulated to think about all of this further.  Take care

*All artwork and text included in this blog is copyright protected by Cathy Hegman and should not be reproduced in any form or fashion or used without the written permission of Cathy Hegman. All text and artwork included in this blog are solely the thoughts and original art of the artist, Cathy Hegman, unless otherwise noted, and are meant only to be guidelines and thoughts for others to read.my blog.